Frank’s birthday was Saturday night. We were up late, and had a friend linger until 5am. Frank and I passed out around 5:30-6ish.
At 9:45am, my phone rings. It comes up “Restricted.” This can only be either Chrissy or Grandma Flo. Because I am not thinking clearly, I pick up. (I am sure more Grandma Flo stories will follow…)
She wants to wish Frank a happy belated birthday. Two days belated. Before 10am on a Sunday, even though she has been previously told not to call so early on a Sunday. She hears my sleepy voice, and is indignant that I am still asleep. I promise to call her later and fall back on to my drool-pillow and sleep. For another hour.
The phone rings (at the less terrifying 10:45). It’s my other grandparents. The grandparents that I just had a conversation with on Friday and encouraged them to call me, instead of not calling and then giving me a guilt trip until I finally call (usually every 2-3 days.)
I think I have learned my lesson. I will put my needs first and let it go to voicemail. So, I do. But, because I am not entirely cured of my neuroses, I listen to the voicemail, to make sure everything is okay. Turns out Grandma Elaine called to wish Frank a happy belated birthday. Sense a theme here? Anyway, she ends it asking for me to call her back, she needs to tell me something. It doesn’t sound dire, so I fall back asleep.
I sleep for 3 minutes, because the phone rings again. It’s Grandma Elaine! Now, nervous – I pick up – it has to be important, because why would she call again right after leaving a voice mail? She hears my very awesome sleepy voice, and immediately apologizes, feels guilty and hangs up.
Wonderful. Now I am wide awake. I let a few minutes go buy, and I call her back. The following is an exact transcript of our conversation.
Erica: Hi Grandma. I am awake now – sorry about that. What’s up?
Grandma: Oh, I am so sorry to wake you, I just had to tell you something.
Erica: Okay. What?
Grandma: I was at Publix, and grandpa found spreadable Gorgonzola cheese!
Erica: …… okay…?
Grandma: It was $6.49! I thought of you!
Erica: Thanks. Why?
Grandma: Because you love parties!
Erica: Grandma, I am not following you.
Grandma: On a Ritz! A little shmear on a Ritz and its a great appetizer.
I think it goes without saying that we of course, have never had a conversation about appetizers or my cheese preferences. Welcome to my blog.