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Really? That’s what you thought was appropriate?

September 6, 2011

It never ceases to amaze me what comes out of people’s mouths. And luckily, I have a blog to share all the “Did they REALLY just say that?” horror.

I was at a gathering of strangers with a common goal this weekend (okay, it was a WeightWatchers meeting) and the Leader was asking people how they did over the week, was their eating under control, etc. Normal stuff. And this  one weird, fidgety guy next to me raises his hand and says that he ate and drank a lot this weekend. More than normal. “Why?” He goes on to explain that his friend died. One of two people that died as a result of Hurricane Irene. He was rafting. And he was very upset. His daughter (wife?) pipes up that he never drinks.

So, that was awkward. We are strangers. He’s obviously in need of comfort, but I don’t know him from a hole in the wall. I  make a murmuring “so sorry.” And then some guy in the front row (whose wife earlier grilled someone about what she was doing in a McDonald’s) asks what the dead guy’s name was.What? Why?

The guy responds with his name.

Then Mr. Sensitive in the front row responds “Oh! Yeah. They found his body this morning.”

Well, gee sir. Thanks for proving how up on local news you are. Congrats.

Douchebag. Like, on what planet is that something you think a guy’s friend would want to hear on a Sunday morning at his weight loss support group?

I’ve had my own share of “wtf?” moments lately. I know that when you decide to get married and have a wedding, everyone has an opinion or  a piece of advice to offer. I was prepared for that. What I wasn’t prepared for was for a large majority of people, immediately upon hearing I am getting married, ask me (verbatim) “Well, now that your dad is dead, who is walking you down the aisle?”

It’s like a knife in the heart, every time. Now first off – I never intended to have my dad walk me down the aisle. I always saw this as a solo trip. But I am very, very keenly aware that my dad isn’t here to share this day with me. And that I’ll never get to have the option to offer him that honor. Or have a dad-daughter dance. Or any of those things. And the fact that people bring it up as soon as I share my happy news? Kills me.

 

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. September 6, 2011 8:43 pm

    Jesus Christ.

    A few months after my dad died, I ran into a distant family friend at the drugstore. After mentioning that she had heard about my dad and was sorry, she said, “It must really be hard for you that you fought so much with him when you were a teenager.”

  2. JessB permalink
    September 7, 2011 8:48 pm

    Oh man. People are idiots. I’m sorry about that. I keep coming up against this ‘people are idiots’ thing lately, and it doesn’t get any easier to deal with, but that is just a new level of awful.

    Sending you good vibrations from Down Under!

    ***And I just realised how that might read. I’m, you know, sending you happy thoughts. And I live in Australia.So that’s that. ***

    • September 20, 2011 8:51 pm

      I appreciate both meanings of those vibrations. And am appropriately appreciative. Thanks Jess!

  3. October 25, 2011 1:57 pm

    Wow. Just wow.

    People are getting weirder and weirder and dumber and dumber. You should have been a fly on the wall fo rmy annual review! Talk about Ca-RAZY! LOL!

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